Archive for the ‘Courts’ Category

SAN FRANCISCO-In an unprecedented move, the United States Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit ruled today that the United States Consitution is “unconstitutional.”  In the case of Richmond vs. Allegri, the plaintiff, an owner of a delicatessen, sued the City of Redmond, Washington over its refusal to allow store owners to display American flags larger than 12 inches in shop windows.  The Court sided with the City of Redmond, agreeing that they have the right to regulate displays of all types and sizes, including those with a patriotic theme.  Writing for the majority, Judge Stephen Reinhold stated:

“The actual problem that lies at the heart of this matter is the fact that the First Amendment of the United States Constitution grants a freedom of speech to the citizenry of the nation.  Therefore, we find that the logical decision to prevent progress in the area of municipal governance is to find the Constitution, ‘unconstitutional’.”

Several civil rights organizations across the nation immediately denounced the decision and vowed to appeal to the Supreme Court.  However, the Ninth Circuit judges also declared that they had no right to appeal since the Supreme Court is now null and void under their decision.  They further stated that since there was no longer a governing authority in the United States, they will begin the process of selecting a new national leader.  Sources close to the Court have said that the list of names of possible leaders include Barack Obama, Robert F. Kennedy, Jr., Jesse Jackson and Arnold Schwarzeneggar.